The person most likely to give you herpes is the person who doesn’t know they have it in the first place.
On the other hand, herpes itself honestly isn’t that big of a deal for most of us.
They do not barter or keep score, or make a pros and cons list when it comes to asking you on a third date.
How did my partners after my diagnosis make the decision of whether or not to sleep with me? But mostly they looked at me, and thought about the fun, challenging conversations we had, and remembered how gorgeous my thick hair is.
They considered me as a full person, not the “side-effects” of having feelings for me.
I don’t want to be the selfless Mother Teresa of herpes.
It’s far more fun to be the loud, controversial and brilliant Kanye West of herpes.
One of the most romantic moments of my life was when an old partner told me that I had so thoroughly de-stigmatized herpes for him that he saw contracting from me as an inevitability he chose, rather than a nightmare I should have panic attacks over (and although I continued to have said panic attacks, I never did transmit to him).