Like-minded people actually make for easier and healthy long-term relationships, said Dr. The more you see eye-to-eye on, the less there is to argue and compromise about.“That means you believe at any cost that you’re going to find that love; love is meant for you and it will come to you so that you just have to date like hell until you find it,” Gandhi said.You have to embrace the process of dating, so adopting a “psychotic optimist” mindset will make it more fun once you’re convinced true love is really out there for you.She’s amazed people often complain they don’t meet anyone, but then go out and keep their heads down the entire time, staring at their devices.
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If you’re shy, realize you could be less shy.“The idea is that you have to train for everything, and you have to train for love as well,” Schwartz said. You’re not a finished product unless you’re dead.”RELATED: Does dating feel like an 'unpaid internship'?
Author's advice to find love It’s important after a divorce or any break-up after a long relationship to take some time to be alone, said Nicole Baras Feuer, a divorce coach with Start Over Smart in Westport, Connecticut.“You will be in better shape to meet the ‘right’ person if you have time to heal, spend time alone to figure out who you are again, reflect on what went wrong,” Feuer said.
RELATED: How to find lifetime love: 10 secrets from couples married for decades You can skip singles events if you don’t like them, but you have to go where you can meet people, Schwartz advised.
Join social groups or meet-ups; be a worker bee in a cause you believe in; get involved in political parties.
“So you don't repeat the same mistakes over and over again.”Most good love is a slow burn — it takes a while to develop, Gandhi said.