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For general coping and self-care tips, visit Crisis Centre’s People of any gender identity are capable of using or experiencing violence in an intimate relationship, including those who do not identify as men or women.For this reason, we use gender-neutral language throughout this section (e.g. However, it is important to acknowledge that intimate partner abuse is a highly gendered form of violence.People who have experienced violence have different needs and priorities and may be influenced by: For this reason, ask the person who experienced violence what they need, rather than taking a default course of action such as calling the police. those with precarious immigration status and those from groups that have experienced police violence), calling the police may not be the safest action to take.

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The majority of people who use violence against their partners are We also refrain from using labeling language such as “survivor” or “victim,” opting instead for the term “people who have experienced violence,” although people should always be free to identify or label their own experiences however they wish.

We avoid using labeling language such as “abuser” or “perpetrator,” instead using the term “people who have used violence.” Experiencing intimate partner violence often undermines a person’s power, control, and confidence in their choices.

Do your best to prevent that isolation by continuing to reach out with offers of support, regardless of how long it may take the person experiencing violence to accept that support.

Just as there is no “perfect victim,” there is no perfect way to intervene or offer support.

Coming to terms with experiences of violence can be a long and complicated process, and it may be frustrating or distressing for you to witness.